Where did everyone go? Longest line up today was 0 minutes. #rainyday #dedicatedloveforkdays #kdays

Where did everyone go? Longest line up today was 0 minutes. #rainyday #dedicatedloveforkdays #kdays

sniffingrainbowdust:

Do you ever start rubbing your eyes and then it feels really good and you can’t stop so it’s like eye masturbation

(Source: frnkoreo)

598,938 notes

unfollowlng:

seenaill:

unfollowlng:

If you think your mom overreacts just remember once my mom cancelled our trip to New York because I refused to eat the meatloaf she made

my mom accused me of selling my birth certificate and social security to the black market when she couldn’t find them

you win

93,372 notes

gnarly:

When you’re sitting on the toilet and realize you forgot your phone

image

47,379 notes

kissmeok:

♡Love/Couples♡

kissmeok:

♡Love/Couples♡

92,269 notes

hanukkahlewinsky:

friend: “i can only bring one friend. wanna go?” 

me:

image

238,420 notes

suethespiders:

*rides off into the sunset on your dad*

suethespiders:

*rides off into the sunset on your dad*

84,002 notes

All them toys!!! #kdays

All them toys!!! #kdays

This thing is pikahuge!! 😍😍 TY @cy_rus_ #kdays #earsaresobouncy

This thing is pikahuge!! 😍😍 TY @cy_rus_ #kdays #earsaresobouncy

skypestripper:

its not good sex unless u have to glue ur penis back on

82,607 notes

tallbread:

"suck my dick" 

"nah sorry i have a shrimp allergy"

(Source: australianprostitute)

111,396 notes